It’s also important to note that while there’s a lot of overlap between kinks and fetishes, they’re not the same thing. My Mother’s Death Made Me Unspeakably Horny.Basically, while there are plenty of sex practices that are widely considered kinky (like many of the ones listed here!) there’s an extent to which kinkiness is in the eye of the beholder. If kink is something that “deviates from the norm,” then what counts as kinky depends on what we (both as individuals and, to some extent, as a society) define as normal or “vanilla.” For example, using toys during sex might be kinky for one person, while totally run-of-the-mill for another, says Rosen. Of course, this also means that what constitutes kink is subjective, adds Rosen. Basically, a kink can refer to any sex act, fantasy, or turn-on that goes beyond the norm of strictly vanilla sex, says sex therapist Liz Powell, PhD. “‘Kink’ is an umbrella term for any sexual activity or turn-on that is outside of the mainstream of what is generally considered to be sexual,” says sex therapist Sara Rosen, LCSW. Related Storyīut before we break down the individual kinks and fetishes themselves, let’s first get clear on what we’re really talking about here. Hence why we’ve put together this comprehensive list of kinks and fetishes, from common ones you may already be familiar with-like BDSM-to more niche practices you may have never heard of. Now, wherever you fall on the kinkiness scale, from experienced kinkster to 100 percent vanilla, you may be wondering what exactly makes a kink a kink-and, for that matter, what makes a fetish a fetish. And whether you and your go-to toy are vibing along to a fantasy or you’re trying out new positions with a partner (or two, or three, etc.), a lot of your favorite freaky-deaky activities may just fall under the category of kinks and fetishes. Basically, any form of erotic touch or play enjoyed between two or more people (or between you and yourself) for the sake of sensual pleasure “counts as” sex. In case you haven’t heard, sex is so much more than just penetrative intercourse.
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